I have received several emails and comments from people like me, from The Spouses. I am humbled by all of you who have reached out to tell your story. It is an incredibly brave thing to tell a stranger about something in your life so personal and painful. I am honored to have given voice …
Tag: TisforTransgender
What If
On Wednesday last week, Katie's hormone dose was doubled and her doctor prescribed testosterone blockers. The rate at which Katie will feminize physically is going to get faster and I'm terrified. As Katie and I lay in bed on Sunday, reflecting on our weekend, a familiar stream of consciousness brought me to tears. What if I …
“T” is for Transgender: Pride 2018
I have celebrated Pride for many years in a row, at least 5 or 6. It's such a wonderful, happy time in Seattle. There is beauty in people who have personally struggled coming together to celebrate being proud of who they are. The positive energy is enigmatic, contagious. The Pride Parade on Sunday has always …
Mourning
I recently was at work requesting days off for various weddings, camping trips and Beyonce concerts that are already scheduled throughout the remainder of the year when it occurred to me that I should look and see when the 1-year anniversary of The Outing is. In considering the gravity of that day, I don't think …
Fire, Weddings, and Ear Piercing
A couple weeks ago, Katie and I had the distinctive honor of witnessing 1 of her cousins get married. This was the first of 2 weddings this summer that we both were nervous about. Our anxiety was rooted so early on, we even discussed these weddings in The Outing. I need to point out that …
Father’s Day
This morning, I asked Katie if she wanted to wish her dad a happy Father's Day. We haven't spoken to him for a long time. Katie and I see our lives differently than he does and it's been difficult for us to find a way to each other, to connect on the island formerly seen …
Doubt and a Glass Half-full
Since Katie came out, there has only been a handful of times where I've been away from her for more than 1 night. Going to Texas in May was one of those times. The first time was back in December, when I took some time to visit my mom for a much needed week-long break. …
Bathroom Protocol
Tonight, I asked Katie a pressing question that I'm sure very few of us ever ask our significant others: are you peeing standing up, or sitting down now that you identify as a lady? I was curious because, as we are trained to do early in life, men pee standing up and women pee sitting …
Orcas Island and Intersectionality
I've spent the past week at my mom's house, a much needed reprieve from what I've fondly started calling my Stress Bubble at home and work this past month. Working in uninterrupted silence of my mom's office is so nice. I'm currently looking at my mom's dog, Gigi sleep for the 10th hour of the …
Spotted: A Transgender Spouse in the Wild
Several weeks ago I attended the support group and met the first person I've ever met who looked close to my age, had just been married, and their significant other had come out as transgender. I was so excited! To meet someone like me who didn't have kids and loves their spouse, but is grappling …
Emotional Labor and Wearing Glasses
Part of our lives over the past few months has been learning how to redefine the simple structures of running our household. Pre-outing, I took on the burdens of emotional labor without second thought that maybe those burdens didn't need to be entirely mine. I've always told myself that Katie and I have "different standards …
Time for a Dress
This week, for the first time ever, I left the house with my wife while she wore a dress. Wednesday was a warm day in Seattle. To clairfy, "warm" means it wasn't raining, the sun was out, and the temperature was 65 degrees. Spring time and sunshine guarantee Seattleites clog roadways to get to the …
Screening the Haters
My sister has been online dating and one of her early first responses to people is "My sister is married to someone who is transgender, is that going to be a problem?" My feelings:
Pain, Fear, and Email
To say that this week has been difficult would really undermine the definition of the word. Upon reflection, it's amazing how much better I feel not hiding my life with Katie anymore. Given the circumstances, I would walk this pathway every time. That said, knowing how much pain this is causing others is really hard. …
Natalie Revelations About Transgender Culture Post #1: Will and Grace
Disclaimer: Please know that I am very aware I probably offended a lot of people in this post with both my ignorance, lack of research on this topic and overall inability to filter myself. If you have constructive criticism or somewhere I can find some reading on this topic, please point me in the right direction. …
Continue reading Natalie Revelations About Transgender Culture Post #1: Will and Grace
"T" is for Trans 