As one can imagine, there are a lot of complicated conversations that happen when your significant other comes out as transgender. One of these joyful topics is no different than any other couple: when and how do we want to have a family? Before Katie came out to me, I was on the fence about …
Tag: MtF
Humbled
I have received several emails and comments from people like me, from The Spouses. I am humbled by all of you who have reached out to tell your story. It is an incredibly brave thing to tell a stranger about something in your life so personal and painful. I am honored to have given voice …
What If
On Wednesday last week, Katie's hormone dose was doubled and her doctor prescribed testosterone blockers. The rate at which Katie will feminize physically is going to get faster and I'm terrified. As Katie and I lay in bed on Sunday, reflecting on our weekend, a familiar stream of consciousness brought me to tears. What if I …
“T” is for Transgender: Pride 2018
I have celebrated Pride for many years in a row, at least 5 or 6. It's such a wonderful, happy time in Seattle. There is beauty in people who have personally struggled coming together to celebrate being proud of who they are. The positive energy is enigmatic, contagious. The Pride Parade on Sunday has always …
Mourning
I recently was at work requesting days off for various weddings, camping trips and Beyonce concerts that are already scheduled throughout the remainder of the year when it occurred to me that I should look and see when the 1-year anniversary of The Outing is. In considering the gravity of that day, I don't think …
Fire, Weddings, and Ear Piercing
A couple weeks ago, Katie and I had the distinctive honor of witnessing 1 of her cousins get married. This was the first of 2 weddings this summer that we both were nervous about. Our anxiety was rooted so early on, we even discussed these weddings in The Outing. I need to point out that …
Father’s Day
This morning, I asked Katie if she wanted to wish her dad a happy Father's Day. We haven't spoken to him for a long time. Katie and I see our lives differently than he does and it's been difficult for us to find a way to each other, to connect on the island formerly seen …
Bathroom Protocol
Tonight, I asked Katie a pressing question that I'm sure very few of us ever ask our significant others: are you peeing standing up, or sitting down now that you identify as a lady? I was curious because, as we are trained to do early in life, men pee standing up and women pee sitting …
Orcas Island and Intersectionality
I've spent the past week at my mom's house, a much needed reprieve from what I've fondly started calling my Stress Bubble at home and work this past month. Working in uninterrupted silence of my mom's office is so nice. I'm currently looking at my mom's dog, Gigi sleep for the 10th hour of the …
Emotional Labor and Wearing Glasses
Part of our lives over the past few months has been learning how to redefine the simple structures of running our household. Pre-outing, I took on the burdens of emotional labor without second thought that maybe those burdens didn't need to be entirely mine. I've always told myself that Katie and I have "different standards …
Time for a Dress
This week, for the first time ever, I left the house with my wife while she wore a dress. Wednesday was a warm day in Seattle. To clairfy, "warm" means it wasn't raining, the sun was out, and the temperature was 65 degrees. Spring time and sunshine guarantee Seattleites clog roadways to get to the …
Screening the Haters
My sister has been online dating and one of her early first responses to people is "My sister is married to someone who is transgender, is that going to be a problem?" My feelings:
Natalie Revelations About Transgender Culture Post #1: Will and Grace
Disclaimer: Please know that I am very aware I probably offended a lot of people in this post with both my ignorance, lack of research on this topic and overall inability to filter myself. If you have constructive criticism or somewhere I can find some reading on this topic, please point me in the right direction. …
Continue reading Natalie Revelations About Transgender Culture Post #1: Will and Grace
Reunions and Reflections
Last weekend, I had the pleasure of seeing an old friend from high school. Due to our priorities being in different places, we hadn't stayed in touch. I could belabor the details of what happened between us in school, the ways in which I was hurt by this person and in turn I probably hurt …
Disneyland and a Birthday
Katie's birthday is February 23rd. It's the perfect time of year for a Seattle-lite to make an excuse to vacation somewhere sunny. It's always in the 3rd month of wintery grey that those of us in the PNW start questioning the sanity with which we chose to live here. I really don't think people decide …
"T" is for Trans 